Bad Post-Doc
Last night, Irene asked me to read her a bedtime story. I did. I then sang her a song. At which point she informed me that she didn't want me to have read the story I did. I asked her if she wanted me to go back in time to have not read it, and she said yes.
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Gillian
"Now everyone was giving her that kind of look UFOlogists get when they suddenly say, 'Hey, if you shade your eyes you can see it is just a flock of geese after all.'"
"You can't erase icing."
"I can't believe it doesn't work! I found it on the internet, man!"
Moderator
Originally Posted by Gillianren
Order of Kilopi
I got a laugh at this - at a zoo, five parrots had to be separated because they were learning swear words from each other and were encouraging each other. Apparently too they noticed they were getting reactions from people after saying certain things and this also seemed to encourage them. Article here:
https://www.msn.com/en-us/music/cele...Uq8?li=BBnb2gh
"The problem with quotes on the Internet is that it is hard to verify their authenticity." — Abraham Lincoln
I say there is an invisible elf in my backyard. How do you prove that I am wrong?
The Leif Ericson Cruiser
Order of Kilopi
Just like in cartoons!
The greatest journey of all time, for all to see
Every mission makes our dreams reality
And our destiny begins with you and me
Through all space and time, the achievement of mankind
As we sail the sea of discovery, on heroes’ wings we fly!
Mostly HarmlessI don't know why this amuses me, but Fraser's automatic bulletin for UT has a headline that reads: "Lakes On Titan Will Have Layers, Like Lakes On Earth, But for a Completely Different".
It's a good read. (CQ link) and (UT link).
I think it's funny because I've heard kids say: "it's exactly the same, except..." far too often.
Last edited by Solfe; 2020-Oct-07 at 03:13 AM. Reason: verbs... nouns... words
Solfe
Order of Kilopi
I read that as "Lawyers" not "Layers".
We'll find out when we get sued for parking our probes on protected wetlands.
"I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright
Order of Kilopi
What do you call lawyers in lakes on Titan?
From the wilderness into the cosmos.
You can not be afraid of the wind, Enterprise: Broken Bow.
https://davidsuniverse.wordpress.com/
Established Member
A law firm with methane pools for clients?
Established Member
When I click on "new posts" or whatever the link is called, I get this summary listing of threads, where the bottom part of the text in each thread title is clipped off. I don't know whether this is a problem with the board, my browser, or what.
Usually, it's no big deal, the meaning is clear, but sometimes the apparent (but wrong) thread title is comical, and occasionally alarming.
The same thing can happen when the thread title is too long, and only the beginning is displayed. Sometimes it's pretty obvious what the thread will be about, and sometimes it's unclear until you click on it and see the full title, but sometimes the meaning is drastically altered due to the premature truncation.
A: "Things that are equal to the same are equal to each other"
B: "The two sides of this triangle are things that are equal to the same"
C: "If A and B are true, Z must be true"
D: "If A and B and C are true, Z must be true"
E: "If A and B and C and D are true, Z must be true"
Therefore, Z: "The two sides of this triangle are equal to each other"
Order of Kilopi
"A good start."
Order of Kilopi
Give 'im a big hand folks!
...Sir, put down your finger.
"I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright
Established Member
It's appeared that way for me for a long time too, and sometimes briefly left me wondering what was meant by the title.
Order of Kilopi
Not really so much "amuses", as "kinda interesting". There is a Zumwalt Class Destroyer sitting in the Strait of Juan De Fuca where I can see it from my house. They only built three. Seeing a somewhat rare object might even make me happy, were I not one of the taxpayers who helped pay for the useless thing.
It was supposed to be the battleship of the 21st century and was built around an advanced 155mm gun system. For which no ammunition exists, because it was going to cost a million dollars a round.
Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.
Member
A comedian who shall remain unnamed made a joke once about a person walking a dog while on the phone, and the leash looked like it was connected to the cellphone, because they were held in the same hand. He thought to himself, "Oh of course, it's a dog-phone."
This is all to say, I can't think of anything good right now that fits into this category, but whenever I do, I think to myself, "Oh, it's a dog-phone!" Just stupid [stuff] that amuses me.
Last edited by PetersCreek; 2020-Oct-11 at 08:54 PM. Reason: Masked language
Order of Kilopi
We should have a "stuff that gives you mixed feelings" thread. It seems to come up a lot.
"I'm planning to live forever. So far, that's working perfectly." Steven Wright
Established Member
I know what you mean. Something like a "Random Musings" thread perhaps?
Established Member
The resemblance is superficial, but I always found it eerie that a 21st century warship would look so much like one of those Southern Civil War steam rams that were hammered together with bits of scrap iron.
Mostly HarmlessI don't know why this popped into my head today, but I remember playing this epic "boardgame" called Triplane Fokker. Each of the players got a plane mounted on a stick on rollers, like a IV stand. The planes and game scale were HO, so we played in a gym. It was very math heavy, so you couldn't just "turn". It was ingenious because the size of the wheels on the stand was proportional to the power of the plane's engine and the amount the wheel could pivot was based on the maneuverability of the plane.
But since it involved physics and physically moving the plane, the game devolved into several different dogfights separated by yards and yards of distance. Since no one had played this game before, we wanted to see what the other players were doing in their dogfight which meant running across the gym to see.
I'm sure my high school gym teacher would appreciate it.
Solfe
Banned
I miss the time when me and my friends -of different alignments- got together to play poker ! its was so much fun.
we did this [spam redacted] and found out that we had totally different and somehow opposite characters.
Last edited by PetersCreek; 2020-Oct-12 at 05:06 PM. Reason: Deleted spam link
Order of Kilopi
2020 has been, well, not a very good year. So I have to look for amusement where I can!
A side-effect of Covid-19 has been that talking heads on TV news shows have had to work from home instead of a studio. When they come on, I just tune out whatever they are discussing and enjoy what they've selected for a background. Books are probably the most popular, sometimes books by the particular commentator turned to face the audience for advertising. Art is also common. I remember one working from her kitchen and both my wife and commented on the amount of stuff she had on the countertop. (Our countertop is, or at least can be, pretty empty; because the toaster, coffee makers, etc are in the pantry.) There was a guy yesterday had a sea urchin on his ceiling. I assume it's a light fixture, but it sure was spiny!
Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.
Order of Kilopi
I just got back from little shopping run to the stores. At the first one I stepped out of the car and realized that summer uniform season is over. Time for long pants and a jacket! BRRRR!
Which I texted my wife. Except autocorrect turned "BRRRR" into "Barry".
ETA: Stuff that bugs me: This post was supposed to be in that thread! Oh, well.
Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.
Order of Kilopi
There is a TV ad for an arthritis ointment showing people rubbing their joints while the song “Love Hurts” plays. I couldn’t help but think that the song “Love Stinks” would be equally appropriate.
I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them. - Jimmy Hoffa
Order of Kilopi
This morning for the first time I saw a woman doing one of those interview things from a bedroom. It was nice and neat, bed all made and everything, but still a bedroom. On at the same time was a guy with a large photo of a mid-1950's Ford Convertible, two-tone red and blue, on his wall behind him.
Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.
Moderator
You should visit You Tube and search for Julie Nolke Pandemic. She has a series of three (so far) videos where she visits herself in the past to discuss what is about to happen.
"I'd like to get a dog but I couldn't take of it."
"Why not?"
"I'll be doing so much travelling."
"Hahahahahahahaha!!"
Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by ignorance or stupidity.
Isaac Asimov
You know, the very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. They don’t alter their views to fit the facts. They alter the facts to fit their views.
Doctor Who
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Order of Kilopi
Just watched all three! Great!
Probably should throw in a language and politics warning, however.
Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.
Mostly HarmlessWell, let's make lemonade out of lemons. I totally got taken in by this post as it reminded me that I am a terrifying poker player. I'll give back your money, twice. But if you play with me a third time, I'll keep your cash.
At my brother-in-law's bachelor party, they had a poker game going where the pot was split with the bride and groom. Fund raising for the happy couple. However, the event planner put some wacky contingencies on how the plot was split up and it was possible for a player to get a better take than the bride and groom (because chips of 5 units are the lowest and undividable equally). Because of that poor planning, there was a heated phone call to my wife which ended with me leaving all of my winnings to the now unhappy couple. The gist of what was happening was I'd win the pot and (slightly less than) 1/2 went to the couple. I'd then sucker people back to the table by dividing my profits equally among all losing players, setting them up to play and lose again.
It took 7 years and a couple of payout diagrams before my brother-in-law realized some of what I was doing. He understands how I "lost" or "gave" $300 to him, but still can't wrap his head around the fact that I also won many times that for him off the other players. It's the division of funds plus the addition of my own funds that stymies his understanding. His wife is still angry that I sharked their guests and I think she understands the whole thing, except the "why?".
When I was a kid, my great grandmother and grandmother forbid me to play games with dice, cards or chance. I really wanted to play, but ended up watching instead. It's a heck of a way to learn how to play.
Solfe
Order of Kilopi
During a break in the weird weather yesterday I got busy and took a load of trash and recycling to the transfer station. When I got home I got a message from Google: "How was Jefferson County Solid Waste? You're popular, your reviews have over 600 views!"
I was tempted to create a review: "This place is a real dump!"
Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscript catapultas habebunt.
Moderator
I don't pay much attention to Google reviews.... they're mostly garbage.
Bad Post-Doc
We will have gone from talking vaguely about how we should have a generator to having a generator in a week.
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Gillian
"Now everyone was giving her that kind of look UFOlogists get when they suddenly say, 'Hey, if you shade your eyes you can see it is just a flock of geese after all.'"
"You can't erase icing."
"I can't believe it doesn't work! I found it on the internet, man!"
Administrator Borealis
It was almost that way for us. I'd floated the idea of a whole-house generator for quite some time but The Wife thought it too expensive...until we had a 2˝-day power outage. So, change of perspective.
And as I was writing this, we had an earthquake. A modest 4.2M but it included a sharp 'bang' tremor. Got the heart rate up just a touch.
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